What If EMDR Doesn't Work?

Short Answer: If EMDR doesn't seem to be working, it doesn't necessarily mean that EMDR cannot help you. Sometimes progress is gradual, the memory or issue you're focusing on may not be the most useful place to start, or you may need to adjust how you're approaching your sessions. It is also possible for EMDR to be a better fit for some people or concerns than others. The important thing is not to judge the entire process based on one session or expect a particular feeling to prove that it worked.

Key Takeaways

• Not noticing a big change after one EMDR session does not mean EMDR isn't working.
• Progress can be gradual and may look different from what you expected.
• The memory, thought, feeling, or issue you choose to focus on can affect the session.
• More frequent or longer sessions do not automatically produce better results.
• If your current approach isn't helping, you can adjust it rather than simply repeating the same session.
• EMDR works well for many people, but no approach works equally well for everyone.

How Do You Know Whether EMDR Is Working?

One reason people wonder whether EMDR is working is that they expect something dramatic to happen during a session.

That isn't necessary.

You might notice that a memory feels less upsetting, that you think about it less often, or that it seems more distant than it did before. You might notice a change in the way you think about yourself or the experience.

Sometimes the change is subtle enough that you do not recognize it immediately.

And sometimes you may finish a session without noticing much change at all.

There is no particular feeling you need to have during or after EMDR for the session to have been worthwhile.

What If Nothing Happens During a Session?

Sometimes a session simply feels uneventful.

You may follow the exercise, focus on what you've chosen to work on, and finish without noticing an obvious change.

That does not automatically tell you whether EMDR will or won't be useful for you.

Rather than trying to force something to happen, notice what actually comes up. A thought, image, feeling, memory, or body sensation may change slightly. Or you may notice very little.

EMDR does not require a dramatic emotional reaction. Crying, feeling tired, having a sudden realization, or experiencing a major shift during every session are not measures of success.

Give It More Than One Session

It is usually too early to decide that EMDR doesn't work for you based on a single session.

Different sessions can feel very different.

One may seem productive while another feels fairly ordinary. You may notice changes during a session, several hours later, or only after looking back over a longer period.

This doesn't mean you need to continue indefinitely if you feel you are getting nowhere. It simply means that one session provides very little information about how you may respond over time.

Make Sure You're Focusing on the Right Thing

Sometimes the issue isn't EMDR itself. It may be what you're focusing on.

For example, you may have chosen a memory because it seems like the obvious one to work on, but another experience, thought, or feeling may actually be more closely connected to what is bothering you now.

You also don't need to start with the biggest or most difficult experience you can think of.

With self-guided EMDR, you can experiment with different targets and notice which ones seem most relevant to you.

If repeatedly focusing on the same thing isn't leading anywhere, simply repeating it harder or longer isn't necessarily the answer.

Don't Try to Force a Result

EMDR isn't a test you can pass by concentrating harder.

Trying to make yourself have a particular emotional response or breakthrough can actually make it harder to simply notice what is happening.

You don't need to:

• Make yourself feel upset
• Find the "perfect" memory
• Concentrate as intensely as possible
• Keep going until something dramatic happens
• Complete increasingly long sessions
• Do sessions more frequently just to speed things up

More isn't necessarily better.

The goal is to follow the process and notice what comes up rather than trying to manufacture a particular result.

Your Expectations May Be Affecting How You Judge Progress

People sometimes expect EMDR to make a difficult memory disappear.

That isn't necessarily what progress looks like.

You may still remember what happened. The difference may be that remembering it doesn't affect you in quite the same way.

For example, you might notice that:

• The memory feels less vivid or immediate.
• You can think about it with less emotional intensity.
• You spend less time thinking about it.
• A situation that used to remind you of it bothers you less.
• Your thoughts about yourself or what happened begin to change.

These changes may happen gradually.

If you're only looking for a dramatic moment when the memory suddenly stops bothering you, you may overlook smaller changes that are already happening.

What If You've Tried Several Sessions and Still Notice No Change?

If you've given EMDR a reasonable try and genuinely aren't noticing any benefit, it makes sense to reconsider your approach.

You could look at:

• What you've been choosing to focus on
• Whether your sessions are long enough for you to settle into the process without making them unnecessarily long
• Whether you're giving yourself enough time between sessions
• Whether you are able to stay focused during the exercises
• Whether another issue or memory might be more relevant
• Whether EMDR is the approach you want to continue using

You don't need to keep repeating exactly the same thing simply because you started with EMDR.

Changing your approach is not the same as failing.

Does EMDR Work for Everyone?

No treatment or self-help approach works equally well for every person.

EMDR has a substantial research base, particularly for PTSD, and many people find it helpful. It is also routinely used for other concerns, including anxiety, grief, and difficult life experiences.

That doesn't mean every person will have the same response.

Some people notice meaningful changes fairly quickly. Others take longer. Some may eventually decide that another approach suits them better.

That variation doesn't mean you did EMDR incorrectly or that you somehow failed at it.

Does a Difficult Session Mean EMDR Isn't Working?

Not necessarily.

A session can feel different from what you expected without being unsuccessful.

You may have trouble concentrating. Your thoughts may wander. You may notice very little happening. You might also decide halfway through that you don't want to continue working on that particular issue.

None of these experiences automatically means EMDR cannot work for you.

With self-guided EMDR, you can pause, stop, choose a different target, or return another day.

Can Changing the Bilateral Stimulation Help?

EMDR can use different forms of bilateral stimulation, including guided eye movements, alternating sounds, or tapping.

People can have preferences about which form feels easiest to follow.

If you find one type distracting or difficult to concentrate on, trying another available option may make the exercise easier to engage with.

The goal isn't to find a form that produces the strongest reaction. It is to find one that allows you to follow the process comfortably and maintain your attention.

What About Virtual EMDR?

Virtual EMDR is a structured, self-guided program, which means you have flexibility to adjust how you work through the process.

If you aren't noticing progress, you can reconsider the issue you're focusing on, adjust your pace, take more time between sessions, or try a different available form of bilateral stimulation rather than simply repeating the same session.

You can also pause and return later.

The advantage of a self-guided format is that you can pay attention to what seems useful for you and make adjustments as you learn how you respond.

Frequently Asked Questions

How many EMDR sessions does it take before it works?

There isn't one number that applies to everyone. The amount of time can depend on what you're working on, your individual response, and other factors. One session is generally not enough to decide whether EMDR will be useful for you.

Why don't I feel different after EMDR?

Not everyone notices an immediate change after a session. Changes can be subtle or gradual, and some sessions may feel more eventful than others.

Does EMDR have to make me emotional to work?

No. A strong emotional reaction is not required. You do not need to cry, feel exhausted, or have a dramatic breakthrough for a session to be meaningful.

What if my mind keeps wandering during EMDR?

Your attention may wander occasionally. If you notice it happening frequently, you can gently return your attention to the exercise. You may also find that shorter sessions or a different form of bilateral stimulation makes it easier to focus.

Should I do EMDR more often if it isn't working?

Not necessarily. More frequent sessions do not automatically lead to faster progress. It may be more useful to reconsider what you're focusing on or how you're approaching the session rather than simply doing more of them.

What if EMDR still doesn't help me?

EMDR works well for many people, but it doesn't have to be the right approach for everyone. If you've given it a reasonable try and aren't noticing meaningful changes, you can reconsider what you're working on, adjust your approach, or explore other options.

Related Topics

• What Does EMDR Feel Like?
• How Many EMDR Sessions Do You Need?
• How Long Should You Wait Between EMDR Sessions?
• Can You Do EMDR Every Day?

Conclusion

If EMDR doesn't seem to be working, don't assume that one uneventful session means the entire approach has failed.

Progress isn't always dramatic. Sometimes it is gradual, sometimes the issue you're focusing on needs to change, and sometimes adjusting the pace or way you approach your sessions can make a difference.

You also don't need to force EMDR to work. Give yourself enough experience with the process to judge it fairly, pay attention to changes that may be smaller than you expected, and adjust your approach when something isn't helping.

And if you ultimately decide EMDR isn't giving you the results you're looking for, that's useful information too. No single approach needs to be right for everyone.